Following the shock cancellation of the Dornoch Highland Games and a Police Scotland probe into financial irregularities, local gossips at The Eagle have spun a wild yarn. They suggest the [[page-3192039|REAL Dornoch Gondola COIN (RDGC)]] was used to launder the missing funds.

Director of Crypto Currency [[person-lucas-matusik|Lucas Matusik]] (ext 987, sporting his new sample [[news-3216406|trucker hat]]) rubbished the claim. "If you wanted to hide money, you wouldn't put it on a public chain that every crofter with a phone can read," he noted. "You'd use a biscuit tin." The RDGC mempool is perfectly transparent, containing only cabin etiquette notes, a disputed sausage-roll invoice, and a proactive transaction marked "NOT THE GAMES."

CEO [[person-gary-bethune|Dr. Gary Bethune]] agreed: "Laundry requires water. We have a firth. Different thing." Meanwhile, Station Master [[person-stan-pennington|Stan Pennington]] (ext 00) offered cooperation, provided it happens in a one-way queue. Games president Jimmy Macdonald confirmed fundraising is paused. RDGC wishes the Games a swift return and reminds all that the coin's only yield to date is lively banter at the turn. Follow our progress on the [[page-3181153|staff roll]] or subscribe for updates.